My homage continues.
Frankenfish is based off a real event and also hints at consumer consumption of genetically-engineered salmon. Science and reality shoved aside (and I do mean shoved), this movie is a treat that can be found on YouTube; which saves a queue-space on Netflix. The quality is good and the movie even more enjoyable because it’s free. If you are having 90 minutes of nothingness, check it out. I have the link posted at the end. Spoilers follow, so be warned.
Frankenfish is based off a real event and also hints at consumer consumption of genetically-engineered salmon. Science and reality shoved aside (and I do mean shoved), this movie is a treat that can be found on YouTube; which saves a queue-space on Netflix. The quality is good and the movie even more enjoyable because it’s free. If you are having 90 minutes of nothingness, check it out. I have the link posted at the end. Spoilers follow, so be warned.
Sam Rivers, M.E. Also, he's Black. |
Frankenfish deviates from convention by having a black hero and heroine, portrayed by Tory Kittles and K.D. Aubert, respectively. The movie takes place in the Louisiana Bayou. Something is attacking some of the residents. Sam Rivers (played by Kittles; a handsome guy) is a medical examiner sent to investigate the deaths. Sam and a marine biologist named Mary find their way to a small houseboat community and get stuck there. The residents include a “hoodoo” widow woman and her daughter Eliza (played by Aubert), Eliza’s white boyfriend, a hippie couple, a crazy ex-military type and a noodling fisherman named Elmer.
You know things are going to be interesting when Sam and Mary come upon a decapitated alligator (an uncommon sight, I'm told), but the fun begins when Sam and Mary arrive at the community to interview Gloria, a widow whose husband was retardedly murdered by one of the Fish. After a dinner of snapping turtle gumbo, during which we find out that Eliza once had a crush on Sam (they went to the same high school), Elmer leads Sam and Mary to an abandoned boat. Gloria told them that the problems started after the boat was found. After discovering the mauled bodies in the bilge, Mary knocks Elmer into the water and he’s immediately eaten by one of the Frankenfish. Sam and Mary hotfoot it back to the community where the Fish promptly destroy all of the boats. Why this happens is never explained, but it doesn’t matter because it’s hilarious. The Frankenfish do world-class backflips Olympic gymnasts would envy. They walk on land, and they’re at least the size of a Toyota Prius.
Eliza. Smart, resourceful...and Black. |
As funny as the above scene is, nothing compares to the death of Mary. After Ricardo dies, his grill falls over and heats up his shotgun. Mary is standing on the end of Gloria’s porch, explaining a way they can escape when the shotgun discharges, shooting her in the face.
Let me repeat: She gets shot in the face by an unmanned shotgun!
I cannot tell a lie; I laughed so hard I nearly pissed myself. I know tears were in my eyes. It was the best scene in the entire movie. After that, everything went downhill. Mama Frankenfish attacks the houseboats themselves, sinking them. The remaining residents are able to escape via a group of trackers. One of them, a game hunter, pulls a dick move by forcing Sam to go after the Mama. Sam, being a smart fellow, manages to escape with Eliza. It is discovered that the Frankenfish are genetically modified Northern Snakeheads (who apparently can walk on land), bred to be hunted by the game hunter. This fucking guy gets his ass handed to him by the Daddy Frankenfish, who happens to be the size of an Escalade.
The ending is too quick and anticlimactic, but it’s memorable because the last two standing are Sam and Eliza. Now they do some decidedly non-Black shit by making out afterwards in the swamp while covered in fish brains, but it was a concession I was happy to make. Black folk don't usually survive these adventures.
Don't say I never gave you anything.
Four and three-quarter stars. The shotgun death-to-the-face alone is totally worth clicking on the YouTube link.
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This was great cheese, I just love SciFi.
ReplyDeleteThis movie wins on all counts. Finding it free on YouTube made my day.
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