Musings in the Dark: Answering the Call


Answering the Call

I’m a fan of The Read, a podcast featuring Kid Fury and his friend Crissle.  In this week’s episode, “Say No to Fuckboys,” Crissle stepped into the pulpit and preached a sermon dedicated to those sorry-ass men who are quick to criticize sistahs and talk about what we have to do and to be to be wifed.  I’ve touched on this in a previous post, but Crissle put everything out there on Front Street and called out each and every one of those men fuckboys.  If you have not heard it, take a few moments and get your life.  Skip to about 15 minutes from the end; they usually do their reads at the end of the podcast.  Crissle gave me so much life.
Like Crissle and millions of other women, I’m so damn tired of sorry men, especially walking fuckups, quick to tell us women what we have to do to meet their standards.  The key words here are “sorry men.”  Men who can’t keep a job for any number of reasons, men who have seven babies by eight different women, men who don’t have a place or car of their own, men who literally have nothing…these are the fools who feel like they can tell a woman who and what to be in order to be wifed…by them.  Whoo, lawd!

*fans self, rubs temples* Shit, I need a motherfuckin’ moment…

 Okay, I'm good now.

Anyway, Crissle read those assholes for blood and dragged them for filth, as she should have.  She also did a call for women (and free-thinking men) who are sick to death of that shit to stand up and put an end to it.  So this is me answering the call.  I’m not going to take it anymore (not that I ever have).  I’m not going to listen to the likes of Tyrese Gibson or Steve Harvey or any of them other basic ninjas on YouTube or anywhere else demean sistahs and tell us what we gotta do to get them.  I’m not going to give up my lifestyle to take care of your sorry ass.  I’m not going to hide or diminish myself just because you are intimidated by my very presence and all you can do to make yourself feel better is condescend and insult me.  I will not give you a pass for being lesser than me.  Fuck alladat shit!  Fuck that and fuck you!  Fuck all parts of you!  I need my peace of mind more than I’ll ever need a man and if he can’t meet me at my level or damn near (and this has nothing to do with money, mind you), then I can’t be bothered.  I won’t be bothered.  I’m too damn old for that shit.  Ain’t no man fine enough or dick good enough to make me give up my inner peace. The devil is a lie!

In my Wifey post, I asked my sistren who want to be married to think about the kind of man they wanted to marry and the kind of wife he would require, and then challenged them to think about the kind of wife they would be. Under no circumstances would I ever ask any woman to lower her standards and marry a no-account loser-ass trifling piece of bullshit.  I believe that every woman worth her salt should never ever ever settle.  But unfortunately, many of them do because they believe all of the monolith myths and the lies and the propaganda fed to them by society, the media, their families, and these sorry-ass men.

The lies that say that they’re unworthy unless they have a man.  The lies that say that, regardless of their personal accomplishments and successes, until they hitch their wagon to a penis-swinging star, they’re invisible, less than, inconsequential.

Well, you know what?

Remember Mark, my brother’s brother-in-law?  The one who wanted to date me but didn’t meet even basic requirements like having a job, and as a result he said I was “mean as hell”cause I wouldn’t give his jack-legged broke ass the time of day? (I wear the “meanness” well and don’t mind doing so if it keeps freeloading felony-laden baby-mama-having leeches like him out of my life)  Well, he found a woman who is willing to put up with all of his bullshit and then some (like driving her car and tricking it out by adding speakers, rims and a new stereo system that she probably paid for because he still doesn’t have a job).  She gives him everything, but is frustrated because nothing’s reciprocated.  Yet she wants to marry this man in spite of the fact that the cops just came and got his ass this past Friday for some bullshit, but I digress.  

My sister-in-law told the woman to her face that she was a stupid hoe and I couldn’t agree more, at least with the stupid part.  Why?  Whyyyyy? All I see in her future is aggravation, pain, loneliness and frustration.  Me myself personally, I’d be short-cuffled and long gone because I can experience those feelings all by myself.  But hey, she has a man so I guess that’s all that matters.  *rolls eyes* And maybe to these fuckboys, a woman like her is the kind of woman worth wifing.  

Have at it then and leave me the hell alone. Keep my name and any related descriptors outta your mouth.  Cause I'm not that bitch.

A friend of mine, who answered Crissle’s call the day before she made it, wrote an epic post on FB.  Here is the most epic part of the epic post:

“I will not stand for it, because women have been nice about this bullshit for too long, and I just can't anymore. I will not teach you anything, I will not hold your stupid nigga hand [and] lead you into the way of becoming a decent human being. Please grow the fuck up and get your shit together because I don't give two cool, smooth fucks about what you have to say...

And neither should the rest of us.

UPDATE:  The movement has begun!  #SayNoToFuckboys


  1. This is a epic post right here. That's why I love you Dr.

    And yeah, she is stupid. Straight up and down. I guess the dick must be that good.

  2. Shana:

    Girl, I doubt it. She's just one of those women who want a man at any cost...even if it's her self-worth, her self-respect, and her soul. More power to her. My sister-in-law will keep me posted, so I'll keep y'all posted.


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